#25 - Opportunities with Old Friends, Atlyss - 08/08/2025
Originally, I was going to make this blogpost last night, but I just kind of didnt feel like publishing it. Usually, I tend to just write these things in the later half of the day as to be honest, I feel more comfortable at night. But this time, I didn't feel like it and here I am today in the early evening instead of the night, just writing up some thoughts.
Yesterday was quite nice and busy; I spent a few hours out and about helping an old University friend. She was holding an Art Exhibition and needed someone to document the whole event; originally, I had said no as at the time I was employed, but given that I ultimately ended up unemployed due to circumstances out of my control, I had the time so I decided to help that old friend out. The whole thing was genuinely lovely: I was surrounded by gorgeous, oil painted artworks. Legitimately, I was stunned. I knew she was a fantastic painter anyway, but it's like as soon as she had a chance to really get out there in the world, she really became free in the sense that she was no longer restricted by others, and I love that honestly. This sort of has made me think on a lot of things concerning people I've known throughout my life, especially within education. On a few of the work days I'd had before my recent unemployment, I had met and talked to a few people who were from my high school, who had all managed to really make a living for themselves be it doing apprenticeships or having to be in big meetings. It's these instances and helping that friend out yesterday that have made me realise just how borked the education system is.
What do I mean by that? Let me explain.
See, when you're in education, you're in a place where you're expected to perform in a sense. By this, you're expected to adhere to rules, you're expected to be a model student, you're expected to be presentable to the masses at any time that the higher ups wish on. So you're in a place where you've got to meld to a mold that the school, place of education, whatever, wants you to fit into. The two people that I met during my still-working days a time or two back were people who often got flak, often got in trouble or wrongly got the ire of the people teaching due to being outgoing people. From the way that they were treated, they not only didnt fit the biased mold that they were expected to fit into, like fitting a square into a triangle, but I remember them getting a fair amount of warnings or detentions and the like. And yet, despite how they were treated back then, despite how unbalanced things were, they ended up making something of themselves. And that deeply makes me happy. In retrospect, as I grow older and think on these years, this idea that all these vibrant teenagers who had so many different interests and different ideas and ways of expressing themselves having to essentially cram themselves into a vision of what others wanted and not allowing them to be themselves was wrong. Even for me, I remember having a proper "fear of god" about the faculty and the teachers, who always seemed primed to be able to give someone a detention even for the smallest things; so instead of being anihilated by the system and the teachers, I decided to admittedly be a bit of a suck-up and play the system to my own advantage, mainly to survive the kind of environment that was present at that high school. It sadly, only helped me become more reclusive as I bottled EVERYTHING up for three whole years, including being homeless at one point; it's no wonder why I'm so overemotional now, years of repressed feelings are still there. I love the place, but it absolutely was not perfect, and the way that those two I spoke to during my employment got treated back then wasnt right. I don't believe in this idea of having to force people to be so prim and proper, people should be able to express themselves while also being able to learn.
But this is where I think about that friend I helped out yesterday. She didn't get that kind of harsh treatment, but I vividly remember how undersupported she was in our university year together. Even as people grow older and the educational environment becomes more professional by the minute, people still fall through the cracks, and she was one of them. She wasn't ENTIRELY forgotten by the system, she had support, but she was overshadowed a ton in my opinion by people who DID get that support, who barely if not DIDNT even need the support because they were light years ahead of everyone else. I also remember that a tendency of the tutors within my university was to push their own tastes forward rather than not let their students actually grow into their own sort of style. And yet, despite the BS that they put a lot of people through, despite the BS that the two people I mentioned while employed went through in high school?
They made something of themselves. And I'm glad. It makes me hopeful too.
Speaking of unemployment, I know, great segway, I've been playing a ton of Atlyss, on my own and with friends. I started playing Atlyss prior to my recent unemployment, but man is it such a good game. I've found myself investing hours upon hours into the game. See, I mentioned that I was homeless back in high school up above and it's certainly true: from September 2016 to February 2017, I was homeless and it was definitely rough from what I remember very vividly. But I remember that in spite of it, I became a massive dothack fan when I bought the first game on PS2 for my birthday back then. I ended up grinding out hours UPON HOURS and becoming a massive fan of the games. So imagine what it must feel like to find a game so alike to the way dothack was, to find a game like that, and get so invested again. It must honestly be good timing because it's such a deeply fun game and I'm really happy to play all the time. I love games that allow me to relax while literally making me feel like a badass, making me feel like I'm such a powerful warrior that can save the day and reunite parts of the world, etc. I'll talk about my feelings on Atlyss and Dothack another time, in detail even more than I have done today, as there's so much I wanna discuss that I can't just mention offhandledly in a blog post.
I'll be in VR later, which I'm happy for. But despite the fact that I've been through a ton of shitty circumstances lately, I'm just...happy to have a lot of people who care. I think in time, i'll be okay.